Thanks Juliana, it really helps to hear how you have a positive experience from identifying as disabled, and I think you’re right that we often feel shame around it when there shouldn’t be any.

I think our society ingrains ableism into us whether we like it or not, so when we are faced with deciding to identify with the ‘d’ word it brings up a lot of shame and feelings of not wanting to be associated with that label. We tend to automatically associate disabled with less than and incapable, but that is far from the truth! Some people with disabilities are some of the most capable and innovative people I know. Disabled is not a dirty word.

Connecting to others with disabilities, whether that’s TBI or something else, has helped me accept my new self and move forward. I still have a lovely life with many things to look forward to, even though it looks different.

In the US there is no registry, and mostly comes down to the individual identifying themselves as such. When I realized it wasn’t up to anyone but me to decide if the disabled label fit, I felt a sense of empowerment and validation. No person or program can decide that for me.

Lecoy, as a former recruitment consultant I appreciate how draining interviewing can be. People think it’s just hard for the candidates, but if you really care about getting the right person, it takes skill and effort to get there.

I understand your distress. We are so conditioned about what it means to be disabled, that we see it as negative. But it’s more to recognise people’s differences.

Well said ? Hope you found the right job for you.

My job was getting harder and harder to do so I decided to apply for a different one. On the electronic application form, they asked the question, do you consider yourself disabled? According to the Equality Act, the definition of being disabled is “…if you have a physical or mental impairment that has a ‘substantial’ and ‘long-term’ negative effect on your ability to do normal daily activities” As I cannot complete a days work without plenty of rest breaks, I therefore considered I had to tick the disability box and answer Yes.

The way I look at it now is I have a disability but that doesn’t meant I cannot live a relatively normal life (whatever normal is!!)

Jo thank you so much for this! That’s how I feel. Yes I know I need support, but I don’t feel the label “disabled” fits. I am able, in some ways I’m a force to be reckoned with. But some days I’m not up to the fight and I need you to be gentle with me. But if everyone was honest, lots of people could fit into that description too.