I shared before in Impatient insight. 5 tips on building tolerance after brain injury about how you can build resilience. And I have been working on this ever since. As a result I can honestly say that I’ve made a marked improvement. But I’m going to level with you. I am not perfect, and I do have a limit. Once crossed, I might behave well, but I get so dizzy.
Yesterday I had a doctors appointment, which I had managed to shoehorn in between some assignments I had for my new coaching business. It was another appointment connected with the issue I mentioned in I have a brain injury, I can feel it in my gut. It was a hot day, but the waiting room was quiet, almost peaceful when I arrived. I took a seat and my partner James who had come with me, did too.
But the peace was not going to last…..
A sweet little toddler and her dad entered the waiting room. She was excited and wanted to explore, so in a fit of giggles she was off! Heading for any door or corridor she could find. Her dad strolled after her to bring her back to the seating area and scooped her up. She squealed, loving the attention. He calmly told her not to be so loud and they took their original positions.
Next a mum and her young baby came in. The child was very upset. Maybe it was the heat, or perhaps they were hungry and tired. I don’t know, but I do know the wailing was loud and making my head pound. I understand that the mum also would have been uncomfortable at this point, so I knew I must just be patient.
My doctor was running late with his appointments, so unfortunately I couldn’t take myself away from this overwhelming scene. The toddler kept giving her dad the slip and was clearly enjoying being cheeky. So between these two youngsters I was beginning to feel trapped in a hot, noisy and chaotic environment.
I didn’t complain, but I was beginning to get dizzy with the bewilderment.
Trying to just accept that I didn’t know how long I would have to wait for was one thing. But dealing with this unwanted commotion when I am still sensitive to noise was getting the better of me. My head started to spin with a dizzy spell. So even if I wanted to go outside and let James stay in the room to let me know when I was called for my appointment, was out of the question. I didn’t trust myself to stay upright on my own.
Accepting that there was nothing I could do to change this situation, I closed my eyes. Well that was a mistake! I almost fell of my chair thanks to my dizzy spell. I had hoped I could sort of zone out, but not this time.
My appointment ran an hour late, but at least these youngsters didn’t have to wait that long to see their doctors. It was still a long time, maybe 30 minutes, but thank goodness I had a chance to recompose myself. But this was just another reminder of how life with a brain injury isn’t always straight forward.
9 replies on “It’s tough being patient when your brain injury makes you dizzy.”
To make my TBI much more fun, I have spells of labrynthitis which can go on for a few months. I’m struggling with one now. Chaotic environments increase this problem significantly. I have had to quit going to church as I can’t handle the minister on loud speaker, the crying babies, the over excited children and the general overwhelming noise. Sometimes I can cope with this type of environment if I wear those tiny ear plugs. I can get the general idea of conversations but it muffles the din. I generally tend to avoid large noisy groups wherever possible and don’t go if I’m tired.
I’m sorry you can’t attend church because I know how important that is to you. But right now you have to protect yourself, and I’m sure the minister and the congregation understand that.
I’m so sorry for you not being able to do something so important to you.We have such big changes to make in our lives. Learning to know when we need to stay home is so helpful. 🙂
the only thing i am able to do is remove myself from the situation and sit on the ground some where out of the way or just not go anywhere. i must have made strides 12 to 13 years ago because i work, shop, and ventured on long distances visits on a few times. i stick to a routine and for the traveling, i have my anxiety pills and always try to keep myself at a distance from groups.
Yes you definitely need to give yourself a pat on the back because you have overcome some serious hurdles there 😃
As the years have gone by, it seems the strange feelings I have always had in my head even before the meningioma surgery, keep changing and unfortunately get worse.
I have so many names for the feeling of “dizziness” and what it causes, even though my otoneurologist told me you are NOT dizzy, you are faint. Okay, I am faint but my head spins, i feel like i am going to fall and sometimes i might collapse.
Well…..after the last bad collapse in a CVS while on vacation in Florida, I’ve learned a few little tricks to help with another diagnosis from yet another doctor. This one is near syncope and syncope, sometimes a normal sequalae to meningioma surgery she said
I find that i must keep sipping water all day long. Gulping isn’t necessary but sipping is. We can’t allow our blood sugar to drop either because although our head trauma and symptoms are neurological; the symptoms of dehydration and low blood sugar will only make us worse. Everyone is susceptible to those.
About a year ago, at a concert my sister was singing in, the minute the orchestra started to play Hayden, so loud, i instantly had a small seizure. The noise overwhelmed my brain and caused uncontrollable jerking and a “sense” of collapse. Once i was out of that mode, my friend helped me out of the concert and now i know i can’t go again unless I have good ear plugs and i check to see who the musician is.
Bright lights, noise, too much talking and background chatter, all cause me to feel a sense of fatigue and faintness until i lose all my strength and need to carefully find a quiet spot to sit alone.
How do i feel about this 25 years later?Awful. Sometimes like a jerk. I still have trouble accepting myself and my reality that i haven’t been able to self heal this one thing. And we all know how long the list is of our symptoms. Yes, I am working on loving kindness toward myself. After all, i didn’t ask for the tumor, but i got it for a reason and learning to live each new year with different events and setbacks, might be my lesson. I do not know. I just try to live one day at a time and to smile.
Valuable advice there, thank you for sharing your story. And yes continue to worth on showing yourself kindness.
The thing that really brings on dizziness for me is a change in the weather, the barometric pressure! From a hot sunny day to a cooler overcast or rainy day and you’ll find me in bed! Sometimes I can hardly stand up. When the seasons change it takes me a couple weeks to adjust. I find it somewhat discouraging as I read these replies from people who are 5, 10, 20 years into their TBI and still have these issues….
Please don’t be disheartened, everyone’s experience is different. And it’s important that we share our experiences so we can learn from each other. Whilst some people might continue to have a particular symptom they are often the ones who develop good coping strategies for it which the rest of us can learn from.